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Glasshouse 1

by Lowswimmer

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1.
Along the line, when you get to try it, it’s present in all the quiet, I guess I’m biased, I hate that I’m right, it’s all aligning, heaven redefining, still way off the base, it must have come from somewhere… I screened the pilot, tethered it to your eyelids, greenlit, I paid to forge the state I left it in. It had your likeness, and a black iris you didn’t. It’s all denial, everything minus the real thing, and I saved it now, and I played it out.
2.
To all that’s out there, look, to all that I had tethered, let down. To all have seen the sun over Lorelai, the acetone was melting white. Now I will meet this too, if I repeat its loop. You called it lots of names, it’s all, in equal measure, your sea power. Atop the peaks, touched the moon on the other side, stood catatonic, held in time. Gotta leave it in the balance, all it stood. Let decay, it’s all it stood, hate the way it got me good.
3.
Lifeforms 03:57
Endless lifeforms, endless time, for now - endless room for doubt. Bleach my life force, end this time for now, end this final bow. Look for the leachers, to find, look for their features, their bite, sat on the bleachers, I died, heaven, to reach it, did I? End this life for me, given as I stand, given as I am, bleak, my light’s forming, beg me as I land, hold me in your hand. Did I live all the time? Let all the preachers be right, summon the creatures, terrifying, did all the teachings align? Heaven, to reach it, did I?
4.
Get On Board 02:37
I felt bad for vanishing, but I kicked myself for griefing, I was just inanimate, didn’t know what was happening. Get on board now. If you had my back, then I was in, a middleman to reckon with, the blood thinners started kicking in, and I was where you live when you get on board now. I went there and back again, it bled me dry of innocence. If I stand by will you begin? I’m on board now.
5.
All this talk of time, never gauged it right, you drained the sea I liked, I swam in it, I tried digging, would you let the waves divide again? Would you let them break, a nicer end? I’ll never make the night, the levee breaks sometimes, but a sequel might suffice, took a graft in spite, still, (can’t be slow) what if all we’ll ever be (can’t be low) was in all the pleasantries? (in your throat) What if all the levity (I can’t float) was distorted empathy?
6.
Face it, I don’t hate this at all, it’s all a facelift, deviated to a blur, everything laced with all your favourite top notes, it’s in the stasis, so belated it was known. ‘Here in the world’ through a microscope, an ear to the door like a domino, have him go wild. It’s in the spaces, in the shapes between the words, you can’t reshape it, ascertain it anymore, ‘cus I had hardly even been around to be sated, to be doped, largely hated, to be airlifted alone, hearing it swirl through a telephone, separate it all by a decimal, have me go wild. And then it got loud, and then I got out, the dope’s in the house, he’s never coming down. Face it, I won’t waste it at all, it’s in the spaces, in the breaks between worlds.
7.
Horsemen 04:11
Driving home, I heard a noise I liked, the four horsemen in the cab behind, shooting pains and a split spine, I ran… It’s a glove that fits us all alike, but I was further from the finish line, wishing luck had stood the test of time, unmanned, I clung on for life… Sick to death of the less divine, you all get what you want on time, I stuck close to the storyline, dry land… Still, the horsemen made me pass the time watching flashbacks in the afterlife, it was pretty good, but it lacked surprise, offhand… I went back four times. A grieving wreck to life, mortal breath on ice, reason slept at night, cheating death done right. Weird, the doorman was all dressed in white? That’s how they get you when you walk in blind. Watch him go, watch him tread the line, he’ll be back…
8.
Pile-Up 04:27
Could you bleed the lines? If we shoot for a pile-up, ‘cus mine were illegible, and that was intentional, but I knew you’d untie them. It must be nice in your element, I’d be lying if I said I was, and it might be kind of irrelevant, but I’ll be fine, if hesitant. Could you see behind me in the roof of your eyelids? It wasn’t a spectacle, and that was commendable, but I knew you’d be tired. I’d been trying to get the courage up, cutting lines in my abdomen, losing light, better pack it up, spend some time on my own for once.
9.
Torpor 02:54
You sat in on every second of torture, you let me roll myself up in a ball, but it’s gotta be out of my head now, it’s gotta be out of my hands now. It set in, the glorious hour of boredom, assembling the audience out of the firewood. It’s gotta be as close as it gets now, It’s gotta be seconds from death now.
10.
Like a Giant 04:18
It better be somewhere, it better be better being ‘dead’, ‘cus it doesn’t feel it, I wasn’t living, though I wasn’t feeling half as bad, I made a killing. Watch me be always watching the exits out the back, watch me be spinning, stood in the hallway, laying me back across your chest, let me be swimming in the taste of my liver, the taste of my stomach giving in, I wasn’t hindered, but I barely got anywhere, barely got anything, barely got started, and you said “did it always?”, getting in bed with all the guilt, I didn’t plan it, this semi-god living, the risible thoughts I hated having, bury them deeper, and I hate that I froze up, whenever I tried to lay it out, but I wasn’t lying, and it was brave to be honest, but I know I was hardly like a lion, I’m just glad that I said it, so let me just lay, man - if it set me off laughing I couldn’t control it - you just let me replay it, and you let me eat lightning, I totally get it. When you rested your head on me, that was when I split in two, that left me empty. You said you were sorry, you said you had sounded like a giant, I barely heard it.

credits

released April 15, 2022

All songs written by Ed Tullett, except Stasis, written by Ed Tullett and Jemima Coulter

Recorded, Produced, Mixed by Ed Tullett
All instruments unless stated below - Ed Tullett
Strings written, recorded, and performed by David Grubb
Pedal Steel - Rhodri Brooks
Sax - Sam Hall
Trombone - David Huntriss
Trumpet - Helen Whitemore
Drums - performed by Charlie Campbell, engineered by Ali Lacey
Backing Vocals - Bethan Jones
Artwork - Mike Roth

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Lowswimmer Bristol, UK

Ed Tullett has served as a primary songwriter, producer, and contributor across five projects (including Novo Amor and Hailaker). But with Lowswimmer - his first solo endeavour - he invites us into a world crafted from a vision that’s decidedly his own. ‘Red-Eye Effect’ is a collection of songs concerned as much with rearview reflection as they are a hopeful sense of venturing forward. ... more

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